Apr 09 2012

Dear Mister Zuckerburg



Dear Mister Zuckerburg,

First of all, I just wanted to take a moment to congratulate you on the upcoming nuptials between Facebook and Instagram. I know you must be very proud and since they have that whole, you know, picture thing in common I am sure that it will be a blissfully happy union. You won’t even need to hire a photographer!

I am curious though, I googled a bit and couldn’t find that they were registered anywhere. Would an iTunes gift card be a gauche? Would something hardware focused be more appropriate? Best Buy? Amazon Prime for life? Oh well, I will muck through it on my own I guess.

Wait, I just had the most brilliant idea! I know exactly what you need! A little weblog with a focus on travel, a little twist on technology and recommendations on how to travel with that technology. A site that has a clever name and at least two or three really dedicated readers. A site that has photographs on it and doesn’t care if they were taken with an iOS or Android device!

Sir, you should really present Instagram with something like that. You should strike while the iron is hot and really demonstrate your affection and interest in this union.

As an agent authorized to negotiate, I am willing to offer that gem to you for a mere $1,000,000.
Merely one tenth of one percent of the dowry you have paid. Enough money to get your point across but not so much as to be ostentatious.

Really, think of the look on Instagram’s face. Think of the gobsmacked tone of voice. “For me? Oh Mark, you shouldn’t have…but I am so glad you did!”

I know. It is a big decision, but Insty deserves the best and you can afford it.

So, I am going to take the liberty of sending the papers over and holding off on a shower present until I hear back from you…just to be prudent.

I know you, and all the pictures, will be so happy together. Lots of likes will propagate.

Also, if up don’t mind friending me and dropping that restraining order I would really appreciate it.

And if your are feeling generous you could like the Restless Tech FB page as well. I mean, I might as well throw that in to help you promote the whole thing. Congrats again by the way!

I will just be waiting here by the phone for your call.

1 comment

  1. Jeff Mac

    Thank you! Sadly, I am still waiting by the phone…

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